This may be an odd thing to post on the heels of my post about my late husband but it is what it is. This is my life here.
God has blessed me unbelievably with the gift of a certain gentleman by the name of Pablo Arnau.
I’ll try to keep this brief, although there is so much to tell!
About a month or two after my husband died, Pablo joined our church and started playing bass guitar for our worship team. One night in February, he had Facebook messaged me and said he thought I was a really nice woman and he would like to take me out for coffee and get to know me.
I explained that my husband Ron had recently passed and thanks but no thanks. He was cool with that and let me know if I needed anything he was there. Over the months we would talk by Facebook messenger maybe once a month just to say hi.
For several months I had been going through MAJOR grieving. Probably worse than the first few months of Ron’s death. Just something about the thought of it being almost a year, and Ron’s birthday, date of death and what would have been our second anniversary right around the corner.
I think right around November things started slowly changing in mine and Pablo’s friendship although I didn’t even realize it until I thought back. We talked a bit more at church and on messenger. I really dug watching him play with the worship team. He made me smile.
We started talking fairly regularly on Facebook. The anniversary date of Ron’s death was on a Sunday. I was contemplating skipping church because I was afraid I would be too emotional. But Pablo convinced me to come. So I did, and honestly I was fine that morning.
When I got to church Pablo was talking to another guy so I just walked by and said, “Good Morning boys.” When I came back through Pablo was waiting and said so gently, “Come here”. We hugged…and hugged…lol.
I had to go make the coffee so we went into the kitchen where we just talked non stop about his gig the night before and only God knows what else. Then we heard Pastor Rich start the service by welcoming everyone and saying a few words. Suddenly we hear him say, “Are you ready to worship God?” Pablo and I are like, Uh-oh. He was supposed to already be up on stage…
Our kitchen has two swinging doors..one on each end of the kitchen. I hugged Pablo and told him Good Luck. He ran out one door and up onto the stage and I ran out the other door. Too funny! I felt like everyone was watching!
That feeling continued when we were worshipping and I happened to look his way- he is sort of hidden behind a couple of other members. He leaned over and looked at me and smiled and I just GRINNED and probably turned all shades of red.
Some of our worship team playing at Hopefest. Pablo is second to the right near the keyboard player.
Later that afternoon Pablo was paintballing with his friend and friends son. Pablo, who is 58 years old decided to be Rambo and fell to his stomach shooting the gun. Unfortunately he also broke his collar bone and cracked several ribs in the process.
That rules out a lot of stuff most people would do on a date…every move hurt him.
We went out for breakfast a day or two later…then I dragged him out to Christmas shop for my grandson. I swear we knew that day that we were onto something here.
Over the last couple of weeks we have gone out several times. One night we went to the mall…I REALLY had to get that Christmas shopping done. In the long run we sat in the stuffed chairs in the middle of the mall for like two hours just talking about God, love, our kids, my husband, whatever. It was really the best time. And every time we see each other it is more of the same.
We tried to keep on the low down but well we just couldn’t. I talked to my kids and Ron’s one son (the one who lives with me and I was especially worried about). They were ok with it. Then one by one I told all of mine and Ron’s friends.
I was so happy that everyone I told said I deserved to be happy and they know Ron would want that for me. Everyone that meets Pablo seems to like him and says Ron would approve. Whew! That helped.
Christmas was really a bag of mixed emotions. My kids hadn’t yet met Pablo and I didn’t know how appropriate it would be to invite him over here. It was our second Christmas with out Ron, but last year he died only 10 days before so this year almost felt like the first.
Pablo was home alone…his kids all live hours away. He was also still in a lot of pain.
I had a totally emotional moment…I was just doing dishes. Suddenly it all hit me. Christmas will never be as we knew it. My husband was dead and I was TOTALLY falling for this awesome guy. And this awesome guy was all alone. That made me cry…and cry…and cry.
Finally I messaged Pablo and told him I was having a hard time here. He was so nice and compassionate but told me not to worry about him. Concentrate on my family. So I did the family dinner thing. Then the kids went off and did their own thing. So did I. I went and picked up Pablo and we went to a bar/restaurant where we sat for hours and just talked and laughed. We always have so much fun!
Then the next day…another totally emotional moment. Pablo still hadn’t met my kids. I said something about Pablo’s broken bones and the kids all acted like I wasn’t even talking. I just started crying…again! I felt like we were never going to be able to progress in our relationship if my kids were acting like this! I went outside to clean out my car and just sat in the back seat and cried. Then I messaged Pablo….”I’m crying again!” Poor guy!
Over the last couple of days he has met my kids and several of my friends. He had met my mom, sister and nephew the week before at the mall. They were here from out of state so it all worked out well. I told him they wanted to meet him and he said, “Let’s go!”
The kids are warming up to him and my 6 year old grandson and the dogs like him…lol. If the dogs like him he must be ok!
So now that I’ve written a novel, I have just a few things to share about Pablo.
He is such a sweet, kind, compassionate man. He is a musician born and raised in the Big Apple and has been playing since a very young age…I think like 9 years old.
He currently gigs with several different bands. He plays bass guitar, bongos and congas. Some of the bands do Spanish music, others old time rock and roll & country, Christian music, etc…
He has produced CD’s and YouTube videos to help promote different bands. A very smart and talented guy if I may say so.
Here is one I just LOVE by Abraxas, one of the bands he has played with. Pablo is on the far right.
Anyway, I have talked enough about my Baby ….I just want to say we both really believe it was orchestrated by God that we are together at this time in our lives.
We have decided to take it one day at a time, do it Gods way and at Gods pace. Something that is so new and refreshing for us both.
Everyone should try it…lol!
P.S. You can follow Pablo on YouTube. And if you are looking for a band to play at an event in or around Syracuse, let me know and I’ll pass the word along to him.